Brides- and grooms-to-be can best save their sanity by skipping the ceremony altogether, but short of that, their best option might be to pick up this empathetic advice book by Atkins, a psychologist and columnist for weddingchannel.com, and Gilbar, the Web site's former editor-in-chief. Using a reader-friendly Q&A format, they discuss a range of wedding-related issues, including stress, the bridal party, parents, future in-laws, money and religion. The authors talk, for example, about the roles that bridesmaids play in the process. "It can become too much," they admit. "More often than not, the bridesmaid ritual brings with it tension, irritation, and arguments that you don't need... And how do you feel? Sometimes betrayed, often let down, and almost always shocked at the changed behavior of women you considered...your closest friends." Atkins and Gilbar have heard their share of horror stories about attendants who bail out on the bride at the last minute or speak ill of her behind her back. To simplify matters, they advise "keeping the lines of communication open" at all times. Let others know what is expected of them, they say. Let them know "how much they mean to you and how much you appreciate what they're doing." Other topics in this book are addressed in similarly practical tones, an approach that could make upcoming nuptials less nerve-wracking for everybody involved.
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